Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and love is again in the air! With February being so focused on love between couples, it is often a time of doubt for women who are going through divorce and separation. Some of the most confident women I know have allowed divorce to make them doubt their decision-making, doubt they are worthy to be loved and doubt that they can ever be whole again. Having been a Divorcée Diva for a few years now, I often forget just how much you go through before you reach that point of becoming victorious over such notions. Some women have yet to get there at all and often ask me how it is possible that when asked if I would do it again, I come with an unequivocal and anticipatory answer of yes! My answer is simply this…if God loves me and I love myself, then my love is complete and it should be easy for me to share that love with the man who God has for me.
Most of us know that God loves us, so that leaves the question of whether you have you learned to love yourself. Your ultimate goal should be to remain true to self and to the desires of your heart. Focus on the past only as opportunity for reflection and re-evaluation to perfect your future, never as reason to doubt who you are and what you are worth. If you are going through this transition, be sure not to get caught up in the bombardment of focus on couples at this time of year. Focus on LOVING YOU!
Here’s a bit of my poetry to remind you what you’re made of:
Elastic recoil hindered from waiting to exhale
But still dancin’ in her stilettos though her feet are calloused from walking away from the drama
There was a time when she would have fought back and said “Go tell it to yo’momma”
Now her tongue is bruised from biting back words of disrespect trying to submit
But he ain’t done it with God so she can’t fix it
Distal phalanges scarred from barely holding on yet being soothed ‘cause she still gets her manicure
As the artwork dries she uses them to turn the pages that lead to Psalm 30
She knows the man of God is out there looking for her somewhere
Like Lazarus she will live and love again
This is the Anatomy of a Divorcée Diva, my friend!